Don't Seek to Make a Point, but to Make a Friend

   Don't seek to make a point, but to make a friend. Or, more correctly, Don't seek to make a point without also seeking to make a friend. Don't try to beat someone up with the facts, but rather use those facts to win them over to your point of view. You will not persuade with ridicule, nor sarcasm, nor put-downs. You will only persuade with love, and with a caring attitude.
   I write this believing both that I often do well in my political discussions, in keeping this dictum, and in knowing that I can sometimes be too sarcastic. I think of one discussion on immigration I was leaving, and I posted something like, "Well, bedtime is calling. This land is my land, his land ain't your land. . . . This land was made, for only me." Leaving like that was leaving with a zinger, attempting only to make a point without regard to making a friend. Now, it can be alright to make a point, but the tone of how you speak should carry the the attitude of seeking friendship. If you are debating to rub somebody's face into the ground, that is one thing. But if you are debating in hopes of changing someone's mind, you should remember the adage, "I don't care how much you know, until I know how much you care.
   Besides, whether you persuade them or not, you still want to treat them right. Leaving them with zingers that sting them is not a way to show love.
   So, how should I have posted? Using that song was okay, if I would have done it more gently. Perhaps I could have said: "Well, goodnight. Hope you all sleep well. Thanks for the discussion. You all are great, but I do wonder about the words of the old Woodie Guthrie song. It  does seem we are suggesting America is not for everyone, almost as if we are changing the words to say, 'This land ain't your land, this land is my land . . . This land was made for only me."  Bless you all, though, and you all have good night."